Bad Day!

Bad day! Bad day! Damm itt!! I lost my black favorite jacket at university yesterday and I really hate myself for that! I was too angry about the fact my group neglected my contribution! They changed whole part of my report and what do you think I would feel? Even the references I had were neglected and removed from the report. How stupid can they be? Do they think I stupid to add those things? Do they think I am inexperienced? Hello! I was a leader twice and I got good results with it. I don't mind I am not the leader but at least I have a contribution in the report. But when I read it, none! I was so enraged that I would really tell them what I want to say, though I didn't cos I don't want to make things worse. Especially that one girl, she looked racism and further more she seem to do things sololy. She looked annoying, when it comes to her sarcasim. Herr ass!

Apart from that, I am having problem with my assignment. Its so difficult. I was wondering why it is not much related to the lecture or exercises we did. Gyaahhh >.<

Now, lets talk about positive things. The end of the day, I didn't need to walk home long. I used a bus that stopped directly outside my house street. Nice right? I even got advise and words from HIM, which makes me feel better. He always cheer me up, no matter what. Although he was busy and all as he chats with me, those words meant something to me.

Just today, me and xanvas talked about HIM. How she fell for him and all. She said she fall for him because he had a father figure. I somehow think it the same as well. He's like a father, lover, brother and friend to me. All in one, I guess thats make me happy, the time I had with me was my happiest time of my life. I miss him... the days... every time I saw couples walking together, they always remind me of the time I had with him... darn soo crazy am I not? heheh

Sick and Missing Someone

Just a message to someone I love when I am down with flu... (Don't worry, I doubt it he'd read my blog anyway hahaha)

I remembered the time when I was as ill as this time,
I remembered you were the one who comfort me the most,
I missed how you lend me your shoulder to lay on, 
I missed your caring hands that would pat my head, 
I missed your soothing words that made me feel loved and cared,
I missed how we talk nonsense (well he's the only person I ever talk nonsense with apart from my sister).

Now I only ask you to chat with me once a week,
make me feel comfortable,
make me feel like you still care for me,
even though you don't love me anymore.

I can't admit I don't love you anymore,
I can't say I still love you either,
I just feel I still like you,
and I really want you by my side,
because it seemed like your the only one who understand and accept me. (Damm I soo hate you for letting me feel this) 

There's this guy in my class looks and even acts like you,
it scares me and also hate it that it makes me think of you,
it feels like fate wants me still to remember you,
how he talks, how he teases, darn it so much like you.

I tried to avoid this guy, but it seem like we keep meeting, somehow,
If it was you, maybe it was a different matter but this??

I want to see you, talk to you, hold you and everything
I even want to hear from you that you still love me. Weird? Yea I know... its been long since we broke up...

I missed those days...

I miss you... alot